Insights of My Old Soul by Judith Ingram

Insights of My Old Soul
by Judith Ingram

Seamless Beginnings

I have seen glory from high
I have wept tears from low
I feel the joy, the pain, the know

If it's true it is absolute
If it's false it fades into knots

I saw a light, it shined the night
When dawn appeared, it wasn't so bright
I glared into its glow seeking truth
I found it to be aloof

Some things are and some are not
Sometimes our path can't be fought

When life has purpose
When the cycle is complete
When the circle repeats
A new life we meet

Surrender

Nothing broken, not a thing undone
To whom is it that we'd won
No loss that cannot emerge
Intensity lingers on the verge

Be still as a humming bird
No flutter to be heard

We're not all the same
Some are sheer, some are maned
If we could see their shaded colour
How absurd to think we're not like others

Be it sparkle, be it dim
Be it rainbows or grey blends
We know our circle spins
Every time we meet again

Never endings are seamless beginnings …

I have some deep and powerful thoughts that I have pondered half of my life. These things, these questions, these convictions and soul-searching thoughts that have guided me, pushed me, pulled me, and overshadowed me with the desire to seek the light. The light of truth. The light of purpose and meaning. The light of path through hope and faith. But most of all, the light of love.

It's not the love for family or friends, for material things, nor self-pleasure in which I sought, for these were given and have always been a blessing, true treasured gifts my grateful soul cherishes. It is the love of a tiny seed I discovered within when it first sparked an awareness of its presence, that moment when I became overpowered by its influence beyond self-control and common sense ... and when I felt possessed by it, driven to feed from it, it fed upon me.

Time and again it deceived me and withered away. Yet, it never ceased to be crushed into the soiled ground my heart had tread upon, as the seed repeatedly bloomed and wilted until it appeared infertile … and only time would heal. The seed laid dormant for so long, perhaps too long, perhaps just long enough to see its workings, to clarify its purpose, to find focus and balance and direction - to embrace its life-giving source - with a clearer perspective. And when I finally obtained this place of understanding, then the desire came to share it with everyone ... yet so few grasped the desire to care. My life, my stories, my experiences, are mine, for me, and perhaps, maybe for others personal interest, or entertainment, or just curiosity.

My soul yearns to help those who suffer, as I suffered with countless heartache, to see that they can survive, they can grow old and flourish beyond the hopelessness - to know true love awaits somewhere, in some time, if not in this one. But I came to realize that I, myself, could not have seen it until I was ready. So, I kept my thoughts mostly to myself over the decades, for I felt they held no purpose for most, but the rare, the fated, the ready souls would come into my life, and I into theirs, and that is how it has always been - until now. Now, I feel, more than ever, that what I hold inside needs to be set free, given to all regardless … and in all my life-stories, the inner working flow, and they flow effortlessly. They flow truthfully. They flow without self-judgment, or concern of judgment. The words flow from the depth of my soul.